Kindness & Respect
Kindness is key in making good human beings. When we think about how we want our children to be as adults, the one value that I always come back to is kindness. I want them to have compassion for others. I want them to treat others as they would want to be treated. I want them to do this not because they expect something in return or want praise but rather because it’s the right thing to do.
In order to have this be a life-long understanding, it should start when they are young. This way, being kind is a part of their lives from the very beginning and is a natural way of interacting with others. Below are some ways to practice and encourage kindness at home or at school.
We create more kindness by being kind.
-Katie Hurley
In this podcast, I talk about how I got inspired to record this after reading a post on Katie Hurley’s Facebook wall. I also talk about how kindness is related to friendship and social skills, and I give a few ideas to help get you started in doing some kind acts, wherever you are. Take a listen!
As a school counselor, I was always looking for ways to improve the school climate. There was a lot of talk about bullying prevention, and figuring out what sorts of programs worked.
I love using this intervention with children to help them visually see the impact that words can have on others. This activity can be used at home or at school.
Inside: An overview of 10 games that can be used to work on social-emotional learning at school, in small group settings or at home.
What was your favorite game to play as a kid? For me, it was Monopoly. My sister and I played this game all the time - it would keep us entertained for hours on a cold winter day.
Inside: a list of social skills, both external (interacting with others) and internal (your inner thoughts & feelings) with playful ways to practice them.
Recently I went to a symposium on play where Stuart Brown, author of Play: How it Shapes the Mind, Opens the Imagination and Invigorates the Soul, was speaking. I took off my mom yoga pants and put on real ones, drove to the symposium and sat down at a table. I pretended that I'm not an introvert and started talking to my neighbor. After I gave her my 30 second description of Encourage Play, she said “that sounds great but what does that really mean?”
“When was the last time you did something kind for someone without being asked?”
I asked this question at dinner recently. My daughter said she helped someone in school find a pencil they lost. I mentioned how my husband had held the door for a couple of people at the coffee shop this morning.
As your daughter gets off the bus, you notice her flushed face and her eyes are filled with tears. You ask what’s wrong, and the words come flooding out. “Julia said she won’t play with me at recess anymore. I don’t understand why she’s mad. I was just telling her the right way to play!”
“You lost your phone again?!! Seriously?” He smiles and chortles while dialing on his own cell phone so I can find mine. Fingers crossed it’s not on silent or do not disturb.
I misplace my cell phone at least twice a day. It’s out of control. I know I should create some sort of system, a place where it always goes, but I haven’t done that yet. Instead I lose it, then spend a few minutes searching, and inevitably, my husband sees me or I ask him to help me. He teases me about it all the time. But it’s kind of our thing we do. I lose my phone and ask for help, he teases me and helps me find it. Rinse and repeat daily :-)
Kindness is key in making good human beings. When I think about how I want my children to be as adults, the one value that I always come back to is that I want them to be kind. I want them to be kind to each other, and to other people. I want them to have compassion for others. I want them to treat others as they would want to be treated. I want them to do this not because they expect something in return or want praise but rather because it’s the right thing to do.
Can I be totally and completely honest with you about something? Truthfully, I’m slightly scared to put this out there, for the fear of the reaction I’ll get from others when I say what I really think.
(deep breath)